Motivation Monday! (:

photo credit: Pinterest

While Monday is almost over, the need for motivation never is! 

It's been a while since I have blogged, especially about my search for a new home and a new job, and it's because my present has been so busy that I haven't had time to think about my future, which may be a good thing! 

Over spring break, instead of seriously job and soul searching, I relaxed. I took a breath that I hadn't realized I had been holding, and it was marvelous. I spent time with my best friend and my family and it was exactly what I needed. I actually read a book for fun - not to tell my kids about, not to learn more best practices - just for fun, and it was so necessary for myself. I participated in a creative writing group that I worked to get accepted into, but have neglected due to work and school, and that was so nice to have people recognize me apart from my job or profession. I realized, over spring break, that a large part of my self-identity is wrapped up in my job. I'll leave that for another blog post. (: 

We are in the midst of EOG review, which is a work-out for me and my kids. Critically thinking for 90% of your day is exhausting for everyone, even the grown-up in the room, so it's been a challenge to help my kids adjust, when I can't even get myself together half the time. I can't complain though - my students are such hard workers; their work ethic will put anyone's to shame. My part time job has finally wrapped, and I am so grateful for that opportunity. The world knows I already didn't make enough money, so having a second job has more than helped out with expenses, but it will be nice to have the time back to focus on school and the potential of another job. 

I have an interview for the job in California on Wednesday via Skype, which is very exciting, but at the same time, I am almost numb to the experience. I think my mind has put itself on auto-pilot while job searching, because it's so overwhelming. I get so anxious that I won't be good enough or I won't make the right decision or I won't like the outcome - I worry more about the outcome than I do about the journey, and it shouldn't be that at all. I need to enjoy the journey and be prepared for an outcome either way. Some people would give up a lot for this opportunity, and I have to take advantage of it. So here's to California and good news! 

With Monday winding to a close and Tuesday getting dressed and packing its lunch to report for duty, take a moment to breathe and remember that this is your life. No one else owns it. No one else is owed an explanation or an answer or a justification. It's your's. You do what you want with it - however little or big it is, you do it. If all else fails, just remember Jay-Z and Beyonce are going on tour together this summer and all will be right in the world again. 

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this, why do you worry about the rest?" Luke 12:25-26

Photo credit: Pinterest

Photo credit: Pinterest

Working Woman Wednesday!

Photo courtesy of Pinterest/Bluntcard 

Feeling frustrated? Waiting for greatness? Wishing for fame and fortune? 

Stop, pause, and enjoy #workingwomanwednesday! 

It's been a week since my last post, and while my job search has slowed and I haven't heard much from other schools, my life has still be a whirlwind. I've been having small moments, where I've been rethinking relocating or leaving my current school, and who knows why? My mind and my life are entities of their own. I can make plans, I can fill out applications and I can call and interview, but at the end of the day, if God and the world has another plan for me, then it all doesn't matter. I have had to come to terms with this lately, that there are times when things are legitimately out of my control. That sounds so stupid, especially since I am 24 - you would think I would have learned or observed that by now. I am an obnoxious control freak, bordering on the point of therapy, and up until now, everything I have wanted, at least in a professional sense, I have gotten. This is the first time I have ever had to slow down and wait. 

Realistically, that's neither here nor there, because I have a current job and current cupcakes, who need me and my undivided attention. We are preparing for EOGs and my students and I are preparing for our version of a championship. My students work so hard and are so very wonderful - I couldn't ask for a better class, and after seeing their Case 21 scores yesterday, they don't have such a bad teacher either. (: 

That brings me to my overall point on this halfway rainy, halfway to spring break Wednesday - today, praise yourself. Take a moment to stop and praise yourself. Don't wait for someone else to do it or someone else to notice - you will be waiting forever. Treat yourself kindly and love yourself. Your opinion matters more than anything else. 

This is so very important to me right now, because I am seeking to believe in myself internally as much as I appear believe in myself externally. I want you to do the same thing - make your inner voice match your outer voice. All of those things you want to hear from someone else, make yourself say them. Don't let others influence how you feel about yourself. You have one self - spend your life loving yourself, and what the world thinks won't matter. 

Photo courtesy of Pinterest 

I wish they all could be California girls...

Yesterday, a representative from the school in California I really, really, really like called me to invite me to an interview. For a moment, I was elated - truly ecstatic. That feeling was quickly followed up with anxiety about what am I leaving behind, what am I sacrificing - such stupid thoughts to have after receiving a call that I have been waiting for. 

Last night, I wallowed in my pity party that I was the only invitee to. I let myself be consumed with fear of losing my best friend, missing my family too much, and thoughts of people forgetting me if I moved away. This morning, though, I had to shake off the hangover from my one person party and remind myself that there was a time in my life when I wasn't afraid of anything, most certainly not moving away. It's time to resurrect that attitude - this is an adventure. I prayed and sought one, and now I've got it - I can't shy away now. 

After the initial shock, I have had to take a step back and review logistics. How will I move my stuff across country? Will Carlos (my cat, the love of my life, my constant man crush monday) like the days long car rides? Will I be another poor, working too hard teacher or can I actually enjoy life? So many questions, very few answers, and at the end of the day, it doesn't matter. 

It doesn't matter. Everything will work itself out, and if it doesn't, I can always call my mom. 

So, California, get ready for this ginger - Lucy's on the way!